Coping During the Holidays

For survivors of domestic violence, navigating this time of year can be a challenge. The media is full of images of happy, smiling families and messages of peace and hope. Workplaces, schools, and shops are abundant with holiday cheer. But for too many people the reality is very different.

Coping with trauma looks different for everyone. Learning healthy coping strategies will not only help you feel stronger mentally and emotionally, but doing so can also lessen your chances of experiencing abuse in the future.

Here are some coping strategies that you may find helpful:

• Reframe your expectations- Looking at the holiday season from a different angle may help you remove the emotional pressure. Reassessing your expectations for how the season will go instead of how it should go can help. What if this is an opportunity to experience something new and different?

• Give thanks- Expressing gratitude can help you appreciate what you have, focus on the positives in life, and see the good in others. It can also help you heal. A gratitude journal is a great way to get started. Begin by writing down all the things you’re grateful for, from the basic everyday things to the more existential ones; remember this is your list and there is no such thing as a “bad list.”

• Share your time- Giving your time to support a cause is a great way to give back and do good, particularly during the holidays. The season is typically filled with opportunities—big or small—to help, including:

  • Provide a holiday meal

  • Donate clothing you no longer use

  • Send someone a heartfelt holiday card

Fall leaves in the background. Text: know that you are worth it.

• Seek out connection- Self-isolation can cause feelings of loneliness. Reaching out to others can help you regain a sense of connection. There are many ways to seek out a connection, including:

  • Calling an old friend

  • Arranging a virtual game night with loved ones who live far away

  • Saying hi to a new neighbor

  • Attending a church service, a neighborhood get together, or another organization you’ve been meaning to check out

• Create a space that brings you joy- Every home deserves some holiday décor! This year, choose to decorate yours with some extra joy and cheer. Who can resist smiling at the sight of lights and holidays decorations? Sometimes, a little focus is all we need to make it through the holidays. Think about one thing you want to achieve this season. Once you have a goal in mind, you can start planning the steps you’ll need to reach it. Then, consider adding these to your calendar to keep yourself accountable, and get started on moving your plan forward. Make sure to keep your goal obtainable.

So, this holiday season, plan ahead, keep to your schedule, and scale back your expectations. If you do, you may have a better chance at enjoying the season.

We are always here when you need to talk. Call or text our 24-Hour Helpline: 216.391.4357 (HELP) or live chat.